Drink Less. Without Giving It Up.
Drinking less is a skill. And it's one you can learn.
If you're tired of drinking more than you planned, automatically pouring a drink at the end of the day, or reaching for another when you meant to stop, you don't need more discipline. You need to understand how to change the habits, thoughts and patterns that keep the cycle going.
Free, confidential and no pressure.
We’ll explore what you want to change and whether coaching is the right fit.
Does Any Of This Sound Familiar?
You planned to have one drink, but somehow had three.
You tell yourself you won’t drink tonight, then find yourself pouring a glass anyway.
You wake up thinking, "Why did I do that again?"
Pouring a drink has become part of your nightly routine, whether you really want one or not.
You want to drink less, but don’t necessarily want to give it up completely.
You're tired of thinking so much about how much you’re drinking.
There’s a big difference between not being able to change and not knowing how to change.
If drinking has become automatic, deciding to drink less isn't always enough. You may know what you want to do differently without knowing how to handle the habits, urges, thoughts and emotions that make it difficult to follow through.
Those are skills.
And skills can be learned.
What if alcohol simply mattered less?
You could stop when you wanted to, or skip the drink altogether, without the internal battle
You could make dinner without automatically reaching for a glass of wine.
You could wake up clear-headed without thinking, “Why did I do that again?”
You could have a stressful day without automatically thinking, “I need a drink.”
Someone could offer you another drink and you could genuinely think, “I'm good.”
Alcohol could simply stop feeling like such a big deal.
“For the first time in probably 30 years, I feel genuinely proud of myself.”
— “James”, private client
ONE-TO-ONE COACHINGPrivate coaching to drink less—without giving it up.
Learn how to change the habits and patterns behind automatic drinking—without relying on willpower or someone else’s rules.
The goal isn't to get better at saying no.
It's to genuinely want the drink less.
At first, drinking less takes real intention. You decide ahead how much you'll drink, count your drinks, and practice stopping when you said you will, even when you still want another.
This practice is necessary. But it’s not the destination.
Over time, drinking has become connected with the end of the workday, making dinner, stress, reward, relaxation or being social. Changing your drinking means working with those patterns—not just controlling what ends up in your glass.
As the old associations lose their strength, alcohol can begin to take up less space in your life.
The aim isn't to never want a drink again.
It's to reach a place where sometimes you want one, sometimes you don't, and neither feels like a big deal.
CLIENT STORYWHEN WE STARTED
“It helps me relax at home after a long day.”
“It provides structure to the day and enables a switch-over from work to play.”
“How desperate I am to be proud of myself.”
What can change when you learn to rely on alcohol less?
NOW
“I feel confident I can now do things I used to do drunk without any alcohol at all.”
“The belief that I need alcohol to ‘live’ certain experiences properly has gone.”
“For the first time in probably 30 years, I feel genuinely proud of myself.”
“James” · Client
Name changed for privacy
THE approachDrinking less is simple.
That doesn't mean it's easy.
You can decide you'll only have two drinks. You can promise yourself you won't drink tonight. But knowing what you want to do isn't the same as knowing how to follow through when the urge for another drink shows up.
That's the part we work on.
Each time you respond differently in a moment when you would normally drink, you begin to interrupt an old pattern.
THE PATTERN WE CHANGE
01
NOTICE THE TRIGGER
See when drinking starts to feel automatic: after work, while making dinner, at social events, on weekends, or in moments of stress.
02
UNDERSTAND THE PULL
Explore what alcohol seems to offer in that moment—relief, reward, confidence, connection, or a way to switch off.
03
CHANGE THE ROUTINE
Practice creating a pause and responding differently before the old habit takes over.
04
BUILD NEW ASSOCIATIONS
Help your brain learn that you can relax, connect, celebrate, or end the day without a drink being the default.
THE DEEPER WORK
The pattern is simple.
What keeps it going is personal.
Maybe it's the glass of wine that's become part of making dinner. The belief that you deserve a drink after a difficult day. The discomfort of being the only one not drinking. The urge for another once you've had the first. Or simply years of doing the same thing at the same time.
That's where coaching comes in.
Together, we explore what makes drinking feel automatic for you and build the skills to change the pattern.
AboutHi, I’m Mary Ellen
For years, wine was simply part of my life: a glass while making dinner, a way to relax at the end of the day, and something I enjoyed socially. On the outside, there was nothing obviously wrong—but I did not like that drinking had become automatic.
I wanted to sleep better, wake up with more energy, and stop feeling as though alcohol was something I had to think about, manage or negotiate with myself over.
I did not want to give up alcohol. I wanted to change the role it played in my life.
I learned to understand my habits, question what I had come to believe about alcohol, and practice new ways of responding when I wanted a drink.
Today, I no longer automatically pour wine while I am making dinner, and I spend far less time thinking about whether I should or should not have a drink. Sometimes I want one. Sometimes I do not.
I now bring that lived experience—alongside my professional training as a life, overdrinking and Integral Coach—to my work with clients.
WORK WITH ME
Take It or Leave It
One-to-one coaching to help alcohol take up less space in your life.
You don't have to give up alcohol to change the role it plays in your life.
In Take It or Leave It, we’ll work together to understand the habits, thoughts and situations behind your drinking, change the patterns that keep it feeling automatic, and build the skills to make different choices when it matters.
This isn’t about following someone else’s rules for drinking. It’s about practicing different choices often enough that alcohol becomes something you are free to take or leave—without either choice feeling like a big deal.
What People Are Saying
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Mary Ellen has been hugely influential on me, helping me change my mindset entirely, take back control of my drinking, and improve so many other things in my life at the same time. Reducing my alcohol intake has not always been easy, but Mary Ellen has helped me enormously and I couldn't be more grateful.
— Rupert
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Mary Ellen knew when to ask the right questions and could so often see clearly what the real issue was when it was foggy for me. She is an adept coach who made me feel very comfortable and trusting, so it was easy for me to open up and be truly honest
— Johanna
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No matter what obstacles I’m dealing with that day or week, I always leave our sessions feeling at ease and less anxious, with a deeper understanding of myself and equipped with the “tools” I need to take the next steps forward
— Zoe
FAQs
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No. My coaching is for people who want to drink less without necessarily giving up alcohol. Your goal might be drinking less often, drinking less when you do drink, or sometimes choosing not to drink at all.
You decide what you want your drinking to look like.
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That’s very common. Knowing that you want to drink less and knowing how to do it consistently are two different things.
We look at what actually happens when your plans go off track, then work with the habits, thoughts, urges and emotions that can make it difficult to follow through.
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No. You do not need to identify as having a drinking problem or want to stop drinking completely.
You may simply know that you are drinking more often or more than you want to, thinking about alcohol more than you would like, or finding it harder than you expected to change the habit.
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No. This coaching is not addiction treatment, medical care or a recovery program, and it is not appropriate for everyone.
If you are concerned that you may be physically dependent on alcohol, experience withdrawal symptoms when you stop or reduce your drinking, or are not sure whether coaching is appropriate for you, please speak with a healthcare professional before making changes to your drinking. Stopping alcohol suddenly when you are physically dependent can be dangerous.
If you are unsure about your drinking, the WHO Alcohol Use Disorders Identification Test, or AUDIT, is a widely used screening tool that can help identify risky or harmful drinking and possible alcohol dependence. It is a screening tool, not a diagnosis.
AUDIT Check Your Drinking self-assessment
This is a screening tool, not a diagnosis.
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We will talk about what is happening with your drinking now, what you would like to change and what has been getting in the way. I will explain how I work, you can ask any questions you have, and we will see whether working together feels like a good fit.
There is no obligation to sign up.
Not ready for coaching? Explore my free resources for practical, non-judgmental support.
Take the next stepReady to make alcohol matter less?
If you're ready to spend less time thinking about drinking and feel more confident in the choices you make around alcohol, let's talk.
On your free consultation, we'll talk about what's happening with your drinking now, what you'd like to change, and what's been getting in the way.
You can ask me any questions you have, and we'll see whether working together feels like the right fit.
Free, confidential and no pressure.